‘Christian’ Trumpsters React To A Hoax That Al Sharpton Was Murdered

Trumpsters are an interesting sub-species of the human race. They tend to have very specific traits in common, such as the inability to formulate independent thought, difficulty reading, comprehending and reproducing the English language, the ability to store massive amounts of hate and ignorance and IQs ranging from 56 to 78. One thing almost all seem to definitely have in common is religion; they are inherently “Christian.”

Their version of “Christian,” — you know, the one that needs to have quotes around it — differs from that of the rest of the world. In most places, a Christian is a kind and loving person who feeds the poor, shelters the homeless, heals the sick and looks out for the good of all mankind by following Christ’s message of peace, equality and love. The Trumpster “Christian” is a dimwitted meathead who believes in the harshest messages of the bible, such as obscure passages from Leviticus and some ridiculous translation that out of context means if you don’t work, you shouldn’t eat. Essentially, they are assholes.

That’s never more obvious than it is when something horrible happens to someone they don’t like, particularly someone of color. Because as a general rule, Trumpsters are also almost always white. In this case, that something horrible was a hoax story from a satire site that claimed that the Reverend Al Sharpton had been murdered outside his home in Chicago. The deplorables came out in droves to not only applaud the news but to confirm that it was probably God’s will:

Those comments are just the tip of the iceberg, as usual. The Resistance, which has been an ongoing liberal troll for quite a while now, waited about 45 minutes and printed an update that it was all a mistake and that Sharpton, who doesn’t even live in Chicago, was alive and well and living in New Jersey. You’d think that Trumpsters, being such good Christians, would be happy to hear that a man wasn’t gunned down in cold blood by domestic terrorists. That’s not quite the vibe they expressed, unfortunately, because along with all of those other traits, Trumpsters are also insufferable douchebags:

Aren’t they swell? Just remember, folks, there are tens of millions just like them running rampant through rural America, guns in one hand, bible in the other, declaring all that is good in this world to be a giant orange traffic cone with a fascist agenda. They blame all of America’s problems not on military over-spending, the destruction of the social safety net or the unfathomable rise of wealth inequality at the top but to minorities “rioting,” transgender high school kids using the bathroom, liberals murdering fetuses for fun and a lack of prayer in public schools.

With the election of a fool to lead them, the dumbing down of America is officially complete.

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