Gingrich To Schumer: Awesome High Lord Donald Trump Is Gonna Give You A Mean Nickname, So There

Newt Gingrich is a man who lives down to his name. In addition to sounding like the villain of a Charles Dickens novel, Newt has all the sniveling, cowardly, obsequiousness of a real life Uriah Heap-wannabe. He’s demonstrated that again and again this election cycle and he did it again on Thursday, when he warned Chuck Schumer, head of the Democrats, to be wary of Donald Trump.

Why?

Because Trump was going to give him a mean nickname, that’s why.

That noise you just heard was my eyes rolling.

While sitting in with Fox & Friends, the stupidest morning show in existence, Gingrich made the following statement:

“Schumer and Trump have known each other for many, many, many years, and I think the president, frankly, just wants to shrink him,” Gingrich said Thursday morning on Fox News’ “Fox & Friends.” “And I would say to Sen. Schumer, if you look what happened to Jeb Bush or you look what happened to Hillary Clinton, you should be very worried if Donald Trump decides to focus on you because, so far, the track record is pretty good that he can define you a lot better than you can define him.”

And what exactly did Trump do for Jeb Bush? He gave Jeb Bush a mean nickname on Twitter. And he coined the term “Crooked Hillary.” Because Republicans think maturity and policy are overrated when there’s a brass, tough-talking bully that needs support.

Trump recently attacked the Democrats on Twitter for their efforts to block his repeal of Obamacare, calling Schumer: “head clown Schumer.”

I never liked Gingrich before, but the last few years have made me actively despise this little worm now. Everything he does makes me think that much less of him, and this empty, schoolyard threat inspires a visceral dislike of him that I can’t quite put to words. Gingrich the Gríma Wormtongue of American politics, except, to continue the Lord of the Rings metaphor, Trump is not Théoden. He’s more like Lotho Sackville-Baggins.

On Wednesday, Schumer made an attempt to rebrand Trump’s movement, spoofing Trump’s “Make America Great Again” slogan with “Make America Sick Again” in response to the Republican efforts to repeal Obamacare. Time will tell if that sticks, but even if it isn’t as catchy, it’s sure as hell a lot more true.

Written By
More from Keter Mason

New French Law Highlights Everything Wrong With American Work Culture And Corporate Greed

It doesn't matter whether it's during office hours or on the weekend...
Read More