I Killed Ted Nugent For Science–Here Are The Results

It was me; I did it. I’m an online serial psychopath. I killed Ted Nugent. In my defense, however, I did it for science. And…well…because trolls will troll.

Before I get to that nitty-gritty, let me address the 800-pound gorilla in the room. Yes, this was fake news written specifically to fool the lowest common denominator in America: The Trumpanzees. If that bothers you, turn back now. Before you do, understand this: What I do here isn’t changing anyone’s vote. This page and these people were specifically designed and targeted after several painstaking years of infiltrating their groups and pages and learning what makes an idiot tick.

These are not rational people. These are the Hoverrounders. They average 67-years-old and they want you the f*ck off their lawn. They are shaking their fists in anger right now waiting for the next BS post to come down the pike from some copy and paste tabloid from Macedonia. You can go there and post the link to Snopes that debunked the stories within hours of their release and they will tell you that Snopes is a liberally-biased propaganda machine owned by George Soros.

So, why f*ck with them? the best reason I have found is this…My 16-year-old daughter is in school in rural Maine. White Privilege is a way of life and while we’re still south enough to enjoy a liberal-voting community, there are many Trumpsters. Pickemup truck driving, bait the bears with a barrel full of day old donuts rednecks. Their children, of which many will follow suit by default, have seen the trolls and the reactions and several have realized that they don’t ever want to be that…stupid. Because these people are truly just ignorant.

The youth of America coming of age will have more access to information than any generation in history, and they know how to use it. The less people get all upset about what trolls do because we might be hurting someone’s feelings or being politically incorrect, the more they embrace the fact that we expose this stupidity as a reality of society that people need to be embarrassed by so they can evolve past it. If you’re a teenager in school and you have cognitive function and Google you’re not going to swing to the right unless you’re an asshole.

Anyway, down to the study.

Ted Nugent Shot and Killed In Hunting Accident.

The sequence of events was simple. First, you have Ted Nugent die in a way that people who love guns just can’t reconcile with. Nugent had no protective gear on in the woods? He was shot from a quarter mile with a scope? No. Something is wrong here. That’s where, and this is no joke, they begin to blame Hillary Clinton. So the next story, which used the same keywords, announces that Ted Nugent was murdered. Speculation rises, and as the potatoes on the page come to declare Hillary Clinton a murderer who should be executed, the liberals who troll them all day long come out in force and turn the post into a playland of kick the dummy, making the activity on the page explode, driving traffic to the story.

One would think that such a blatantly easy lie to debunk would die out with rage and confusion of a page of more than 119K fans. But no. For fun, The next two posts that Ted Nugent was alive and charged with a crime for faking his own death and then another that tells that the liberal troll who started the hoax was arrested — on the very same page where the hoax began — wrapped the whole thing up nicely as a well-produced troll.

You can’t make this stuff up. Oh…wait….

So, to the science…The Facebook page has 119K likes. It was built very specifically for these people. An event like this one, in which the truth is but a click away, should lose us likes, and it did. The page was unliked 285 times over Ted’s death. We gained 914. Essentially, by being absolutely full of sh*t and pissing people off with blatant lies they fall for hook, line and sinker every time, our audience grew. That could be partly because of an influx of liberals as they discover what’s really going on.

The other gauge is follows. The page still has 117K followers, so the ratio is outstanding. By comparison, GOPocalypse has 5K fewer followers than likes, all because the super-sensitive flowers who think this kind of thing is beneath them and counterproductive to their perceived utopia are upset that I write satire sometimes. Clearly. Labeled. Satire.

At the end of the day, the conservatives prove they are unwilling or unable to understand how our society, our government and reality work. I’ve seen the same person tell me they’re unliking the page three times this week.

Conclusion: The entire hard-right have a collective IQ of 70.

And there you have it. You can question my moral fiber now and tell me how disgusting I am for adding to the problem. If that’s how you feel you should probably also log off and go outside for awhile. Some will call me greedy because of the ads because…how dare I make a living by lying to conservatives? Here’s some perspective: I quit working for the “left-wing” tabloids like Addicting Info and company because they prefer to lie to liberals.

If you love this sh*t because not only is it hilarious but needs to be exposed for what it is, join the fun in any of the comments sections of the page and follow the antics from the left on GOPocalypse.

 

 

 

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