Trump Throws A Hiroshima-Class Tantrum After Catching Melania Cheating

Donald Trump threw a hissy fit that any entitled, spoiled little toddler would have have been plenty proud of this morning after waking up to Melania reminding him that he’s a fat, ugly old pig who will NEVER talk down to her again. After rushing off to the bathroom for 43 minutes to do whatever he does to make that thing on the top of his head look like that, Trump came back fuming.

Unfortunately, Melania has had enough. She knows the power she has over the little weasel. Just last night after he told her to fix her crows feet and boot some collagen, she proved she’s still got it by grabbing a janitor in the East Room and serving him a Portuguese Breakfast in the executive coat closet.

Trump, who filmed the episode and ran off to bed without dinner, woke up regretting it this morning and exploded all over the residence. Sources say there were pictures and trinkets and anything that weighed under 4 pounds that he could actually hoist thrown throughout the top two floors of the mansion and that when all was said and done, all Trump could really do was apologize and answer “yes ma’am” when she asked him if he understood his place now.

Imagine that. Trump’s personal assistant, Victor, said that it wasn’t Melania’s fierce warrior looks that took Trump down but the fact that all of the activity caused him to shit himself, leaving little hope of retaining his dignity, never mind the high ground in an argument.

After a tubby and a diaper change, Donald was fired up and ready to take out all of his anger and aggression on the poor and some refugees.


It’s labeled satire for a reason. If it’s not your thing, please just move on.

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